Love may very well be the most important factor to keeping us healthy and young. Thousands of hours of research show that love and intimacy ( or lack of them) are at the root of what makes us sick and what makes us well, what makes us suffer and what leads to healing.
Being alone increases our chances ( by between two and five times) of getting ill; and dying young, no matter how healthily we live. Among patients who survive heart disease, the ones who did best after five years were married, but some had someone to confide in. The next healthiest were patients who where married and had a Confidant. Following were those who were married but didn't have a Confidant. The group who were unmarried and had no close friend to talk to did worse, half died within five years.
You'd think that the more people you talk to the more likely you'd catch a cold from one of them. But research as found the exact opposite. The wider variety of people you talk to often, including partners, children , neighbors, co-workers, fellow volunteers, etc - the lower your chances of getting symptoms of a cold, even if you've been infected. Experts speculate that if you're meeting lots of people you'll be happier and therefore have a stronger immune system.
When women marry, they cut their chances of dying young by half. Men reduce their chances of dying young by five times when there married. Researchers found that married people are most likely to take better care of themselves, for example by eating breakfast, wearing seat belts, exercising regularly etc. Their healthier habits may also explain why they spend fewer days in bed ill, half as much time in the hospital and are less likely to become disabled as they get older.
Happily married men live eight to ten years longer than single or divorced men. Happily married women live three to four years longer than single or divorced women. Women who are in happy relationships are less prone to strokes and heart attacks after menopause, when they're most at risk for heart-relatedproblems. Single women and women involved in dissatisfying relationships are significantly worse off than women in happy relationships in terms of heart disease risk factors like high blood pressure and cholesterol levels.
Lonely people, particularly single men, who don't have deep friendships have higher stress and blood pressure , don't get as much sleep and are more hostile.
Displays of affection like hugging or kissing, between people in committed meaningful relationships can help heal the sick and soothe away worries. The act of touching increases the production of oxytocin, a chemical that affects the emotional centers of the brain and can trigger warmer feelings of affection.Touching also boosts the immune system, stabilizes blood pressure levels, relieves stress and produces endorphins, the body's natural pain reliever.
Independent AIM Member - Marilyn Wilson Price
